Unfortunately, life has to go on….

It has been a few weeks since I last wrote…life has been so busy. But in those weeks I have been blessed enormously by the One who created me.

So I found out back in April that I had been successful at interview for a job I had applied for. I had to keep it secret until the end of April whilst others found out whether they had also been successful. Since then it has been a waiting game. References, health checks, identity checks and so on. I found out yesterday that I will officially be starting my new job in the NHS on Monday. But I will not be doing the role I was interviewed for. I have been asked to cover a higher position until September. I was so surprised when I was asked. At this moment in time I am agency staff. I have worked for the company for only twelve weeks but they still chose me. I truly believe that God made this happen. When I started back in March I was overwhelmed with how much there was to take in. The workload was huge and due to reviews within the NHS a team of five suddenly dropped to two and a half (two full time staff and one part time). I love the job I am doing and I try my best all the time. Most days I want to go and hide in a corner until the end of the day. But I persevere and that is down to God’s strength not mine.

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If you have read my blog over the last few months you will know that my brother passed away suddenly in January. As you can imagine it broke my heart. He was everything to me and I miss him more than words could ever say. God called my brother home. He took one of the most precious people in my life and five days later I started a new job. Although nothing can replace my gorgeous brother, life does, unfortunately, have to go on. I have not forgotten about him or moved on and I don’t think I will for a long time. But God has been faithful and good. Work is not a replacement but a distraction. It is helping me come to terms with adjusting. It is one of God’s many blessings. And for that I am grateful!

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100/365: Children

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100/365: Children — I believe children are gifts from God. I can imagine being a parent is a privilege. However I know that children can make the lives of their parents or guardians difficult. My evidence? Me. I have not been the best child; I have messed up, got things wrong, let my parents down. But they still love me. I think that takes strength. One day I hope I am blessed with a child. I believe I have been taught well in being a parent.

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89/365: Laughter

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89/365: Laughter — I believe laughter really is the best medicine. Laughter can brighten your day, and make you feel better. People often say that having a good cry is good for you. I believe that having a good laugh is good for you too. Always add a little laughter to your day. Laughing is good for the soul!

78/365: Proud

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78/365: Proud — Being proud of someone or something means that we appreciate what has been done, what is being done and what will be done in the future. I am immensely proud of a number of people in my life. My parents for the way they cared for my brother. They dedicated twenty eight years of their lives to him and they did a fantastic job! Also for looking after my sister and I too. I can only imagine how difficult it would have been for them. My beautiful, amazing best friend for all she has achieved. I am proud that she is following her dreams and enjoying the London life. I am also proud of an amazing woman whose heart for the poor is admirable. She works tirelessly to help those in debt and gives them the love and support they need. My big sister has achieved so much since she left school nine years ago; graduating from two of England’s top universities, achieving her Phd in Chemistry and now working for a big company down in Cambridge. I do not say it enough but I am proud of everything she has done.

74/365: Mother

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 74/365: Today is Mother’s day. I am blessed with a wonderful woman as my mother. We may get on each others nerves and argue a fair bit but that does not mean there is an absence of love. As I have got older I have come to love my mother more as I have come to understand the sacrifices and decisions she has made. Today I know my mother will be sad that she does not have all her children near to her or on the other end of the phone so I am determined to make her day as special as possible. Being a mother is not just about giving birth to a child. It is about providing love and support to someone. It is about giving time and making sacrifices in order to see someone else happy. I am grateful that God has given me two wonderful women in my life who have treated me as though I am their daughter. They have supported me, loved me and cared for me. Sometimes they know me better than I know myself! So on this Mothering Sunday I want to thank my birth mother and my two God-given mothers for all the love they pour into my life and for never giving up on me when I let them down.

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63/365: Wish

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63/365:  Wish — We all wish for something; a new car, a bigger house, a spouse, more money in the bank, to be skinnier or prettier, a second chance. We all have different wishes from our friends and family. We all have an idea of what perfect looks like to us; we know what car we want to drive, what our house should look like. I am not particularly materialistic. I don’t mind that my car is not the best there is. It gets me from place to place and that is all that matters. The house I live in is not huge but it is perfect for three people. What do I wish for then? My wishes are quite deep ones. I wish to be reunited with my brother. I know one day that will come true. God only knows when that will be. But for now I have to carry on as best as I can. I wish that my family are able to find true happiness again and that they are able to laugh and smile like they did before. I wish for my friends who are not Christians to come to know God and accept Him as their Saviour. Heaven sounds beautiful and I do not want them to miss it!

59/365: Thanks

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59/365: Thanks — We all have things we are thankful for in life; family, friends, a roof over our head, food on the table, money in the bank. I am thankful for the people in my life who stay by my side even when I push them away. I am thankful for the encouragement and the kindness from others. I am thankful that I have a warm place to live and I am able to eat three meals a day. There are so many people in this world who do not have a place to live, who cannot afford one meal a day let alone three. Appreciate what you have. You have so much more than many other people. Be thankful. Be grateful.