65/365: Disappointment

65/365: Disappointment — We all experience disappointment. We disappoint ourselves, our families and friends. We are not perfect. We make mistakes. We hurt other people. Sometimes when we are angry or upset our actions or words can disappoint others. I believe that if we are disappointed by the actions or words of someone we care about we should never tell them. Simply because telling someone that they have disappointed you can do more harm than good. It can make them feel worthless and annoyed with themselves. It can damage them more than you will ever know. Recently someone told me I had disappointed them. It hurt an awful lot. One of the reasons it hurt was because I was doing what I felt was right. I was told I had disappointed someone because I expressed how the actions of another person had upset me. I felt as though I was not allowed to stand up for myself, felt as though what I was feeling was not important. As humans we all have the right to live our lives happy. We also have the right to stand up for ourselves and to speak out when something has upset us.

51/365: Home

50/365: Home — I believe that a home is not just the building we live in. A home is also about the people who you share that building with. It could be people who are blood related or friends you met through college or university. I think that a home should be filled with love, laughter and compassion. I believe we can find our home in a number of different places. I have my daily home where I live throughout the week and I also have my Church home where I attend several times during the week. A home is much more than the bricks and mortar that keep the building standing. Find a place (or two) that you can call home. A place that makes you happy and where you feel loved.

20/365: Memories

20/365: Memories — We all have memories. Happy memories, sad memories. Memories that make us laugh and those that make us cry. The truth is memories are the things that hold us together. When things are tough we look to those good, happy memories to help us through. Life without memories would not be a life at all

9/365: Happy

9/365: Happy — Whether we are happy or not is our own decision. Being happy is a choice we have to make. We can either choose to be happy or we choose not to be.. It is as simple as that. Life is too short to be anything but happy.

He loved her for who she would become

Standing beside the bed, he watched as she slept. He watched her chest rise and fall as she breathed in and out. She was beautiful in every possible way. Her long, blonde hair, her pale skin, the way she was curled up to keep warm. He could not believe how lucky he was to be with her. This woman, lying before him, made him happy. She made his heart skip a beat when she entered the room, her laugh was his most favourite sound. She was more precious than anything else in his life. Not only did he love her for who she was, he loved her for who she would become. As she altered her sleeping position, he caught a glimpse of her belly, a glimpse of their beautiful baby growing inside her body. He smiled to himself as he climbed in beside his wife and cuddled up close to the two people who made him happy to be alive… 

Memories and Love

Memories and love make the world go round! Today was filled with both. Christmas meal and presents with two very special people and an afternoon playing ‘Tea Party’ with my beautiful three year old cousin! Blessed to be surrounded by such precious people 🙂

Say something I’m giving up on you…

This  sums up exactly where I am right now.

Richness

The world we live in is focused on greed. It is about having as much money as possible, the biggest house, the most expensive car. There are so many people in our world focused on getting rich, being popular and having the best of everything. My heart breaks for those people because greed is a horrible thing to have. Greed leaves you wanting more and you are never satisfied.

I earn under £500 a month, I live at home with my parents and my older brother and my car is certainly not an expensive one. But I am happy. I am blessed. In my eyes I am rich. To me being rich is not about how much money I have in my bank account or how nice my home looks.

To me, being rich is about how much love you give and receive. It is about the kindness you give to others and the kindness you receive from them. Being rich means being surrounded by loved ones, having food on the table at the end of the day, having clothes on your back and a roof over your head. You may not have hundreds of pounds in your bank account but you are richer than those who are homeless or starving. You are richer than those who are living life alone or those who are wearing the same clothes they wore yesterday and the day before.

I volunteer for a charity called Christians Against Poverty (CAP). A friend of mine is a Centre Manager at my church for CAP. She goes out and visits families and individuals who are struggling with debt. Many of these people cannot afford to put food on the table, or to pay their electricity bill. They cannot afford the luxuries that you and I take for granted. CAP is an amazing charity. They offer FREE debt advice and have helped so many people turn their lives around and become debt free. At my church I am in charge of organising the food that we collect for our CAP clients. To me a bag of food is not a lot but to our clients who receive that food it is a lifeline. And to be able to provide that small bag of food to them is an honour and a privilege.

My challenge to you is to think about how rich you are. I am not saying money wise but in terms of the loved ones you have around you, and the kindness that is shown to you on a day to day basis. Take it one step further and visit that old lady down the road with a few of the everyday essentials, or the single mother struggling to make ends meet.

Richness is not about money. Richness is about love.

Back to reality…

So my week at Energise is over. The last day is always the hardest of the camp week. It is a day of thank you’s, goodbyes and hugs with special people. In all honesty I fought back a tear or two throughout that morning. 

Best Friends

My heart hurt as I wrapped my arms around those precious people and listened to their heartbeats. The steady beats of their hearts were a real comfort to me. They were reminders that I am not alone. The sound of their hearts told me that they are there for me. It reminded me that they are people too with their own feelings and emotions. They have their own hardships to face. Despite what they are going through they still put their arms around me and reminded me that they cared, that they loved me. And that made coming home so much easier. 

Best Friends

Partner in crime

Adopted Mother

Lovely lady

Ginger Mother

It was encouraging to know that they are there for me, and that they are only at the other end of the phone, an email away or a half an hour drive away. I have made big mistakes in my life and these people have stuck by me even when I have disappointed them. 

Bear Mat Posing

Let me take a selfie…

Posing in the toilets

The wonderful Sam

Water Balloon faces

Cafe times

Formal selfies

Two of my favourite people

Posing with the wine

I have been home for two days now. I really miss Camp and being surrounded by beautiful people. I got to know new friends and spent time with old ones. I miss giving my adopted mother a hug every morning at breakfast. I miss blasting music and dancing round the bedroom. I miss raving in the dining room to Human by The Killers. I miss throwing water balloons at everyone. I miss rec room fun times at two o clock in the morning. I miss the gorgeous food that we were served everyday. I miss sitting in the tuck shop eating Smarties and laughing until tears streamed down my face at the conversations that were going on. I miss riding in the convertible with my partner in crime and singing along to Wiggle by Jason Derulo. I miss beating boys at pool at midnight. I miss the down the lane bizarre conversations as well as the serious ones. I miss being surrounded by people who accept me for who I am and do not judge me. 

My partner in crime puts it perfectly…

Thank you to those who organised the week and made it what it was. Thank you to those who challenged me with their words. Thank you for those who hugged me when I needed it. Thank you for those who made me laugh and gave me great memories. 

Take me back to MCYC please?

My favourite place

So I arrived in my favourite place at half past two this afternoon. I have spent the afternoon with some of my favourite people. I am a very happy girl at the moment.

I am so excited about this week to see what God has planned for me. I am excited to be spending time with people who make me laugh, who love me despite my flaws and who do not judge me for my mistakes. I am excited about being reunited with my partner in crime and seeing my second mother. This week I will smile, laugh, create happy memories and possibly cry some happy and sad tears. I have been waiting for this week for such a long time.

But for now it is time for a late night chat with my beautiful best friend and then some much needed sleep.

Bring on this exciting week!